Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Pazz'n'jop'n'Hinder


Back in my senior year of high school we all though it would be pretty awesome if we were not dancing to Green Day's "Time of Your Life" and by we I mean my friends and I. Instead we wished to be spinning and kicking and grabbing our crotches to the sinister synths of Thriller. Alas, a much worse fate awaited us at the end of that Prommish tunnel: "Heres to the Night" by Eve 6. That jagged and rusty toenail clipper of a band jabbed itself into my ears again and again, not to mention the voices countless brownroot blondes and swooshfront haired chumps singing in not-so-unison to it. Plus, my date wouldn't dance to the few songs that did appeal to my friends and I.

It was the worst prom ever.

This tangent has a point, and it is this: voting for something that clearly, clearly will not win because everyone else has a sense of obligation is sometimes foolhardy. But if there is anything that saturday morning cartoons have taught me (everything) you have to fight for what you believe in.

I believe that Hinder, yes the band I once described as sounding like a Nickleback burrito that Bon Jovi crapped out, should win The Village Voice's Pazz'n'jop end of the year top ten albums list. Why? Precisely because the blogger "Anthony is Right" is campaigning for every voter to vote for Hinder's perfectly titled 2006 album EXTREME BEHAVIOR.

Why is he campaigning for this? Precisely because The Village Voice is no longer run independantly but is owned by The New Times Media, kind of like clearchannel for beloved art scene go-to mags. Furthermore the beloved Pazz'n'jop mogul, Robert Christgau (if you don't already know all this), was canned/sacked by The New Times Media. Why? It certainly left a lot of people scratching their chins and heads.

Anyway, I think its an hilarious idea to vote Hinder as the top album of the year simply because Hinder's fans are all those brownrooted blonde girls who now wear curlsided cowboy hats and swooshfront haired boys who now all have chlamydia. If I were a respected music journalist (and I am) and voting on this (and I'm not) I'd jump on the Hinderwagon like Hinder jumped on the Nicklewagon. Done.

I've found an even more painful version than the music video of "Lips of an Angel." I mean seriously I'll give you ten high fives or bucks if you sit through the whole thing.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

There are so many things to say, but I've narrowed it down to what is really important, and that's that I Love Josh.....still(tearz).

Stupes said...

...worst prom ever? you weren't convinced by the cupcakes and all-night illicit substance-taking?